Moron!!

I backed my van into someone else's van a couple of months ago. We were leaving the park district and it was totally my fault, I was so embarassed. The woman that I hit had stopped her van directly behind my car. I looked out to my rear right and left, I don't know what happened when I looked directly behind me, but I did not see her. Maybe her windows were lined up with my filthy back window and when I looked, I looked right through both sets...I don't know. But, whatever, totally my fault.

After I got over the embarassment of my mistake and the annoyance of having to answer 50 bagillion questions from my 4 little passengers ("why did we hit that car?", "why aren't we leaving?", "are you going to jail?", "are we going to miss lunch with Matt and Danny...waaahhh"), I started to rethink the "accident" and realized that I probably hit one of the biggest morons in the world and that really ticked me off. First of all, she parked her car directly behind my car, to talk on the phone. She was sitting in the lane of traffic...who does that?!?!?! Second of all, when you are basically parked in the traffic lane of a parking lot, wouldn't you take notice of a car full of people and move when the car turns on, the brake lights come on, the back-up lights come on and the car starts to move? If not, wouldn't you at least beep?!?! Not this woman! Then when I did hit her, she opens her car door to get out, while still talking on the phone and leaves her car door open, now blocking both lanes of traffic! I tell her that I am sorry, but she really needs to move her car. I don't think this woman has been in this country for very long and did not speak great English, she just kept telling me that I hit her. No kidding! I knew that, but I explained to her that if she does not move her car, she is going to get hit again!! So, she finally pulls into the spot next to mine, but way too close to the car on the other side. The woman parked on the other side of her came around to ask her to move her car, she just kept telling her that I hit her. The woman said "that is really too bad, but you need to move your car because I can't get my kid out!". How could I have hit such a dummy?!?! Remember, I am a bit competitive, and I think the thing that bothered me the most was that I "lost" this game of driving to such a horrible driver and dingbat!

Anyway, I was wound up and everytime I was telling someone about my accident, I referred to the woman as a "moron". Well, apparently my kids have been paying close attention to some of my conversations. Last week, we pulled into the parking lot for Karate class. A big SUV was taking up 2 spots. I mumbled something about the "moron". Jack yells from the back "she's here?!?!". I asked him "who's here?". He said "the moron". Huh?!?! I asked him "who are you talking about". He said "the lady that you hit with the van". LOL...whoops!!! "Nope Jack...different moron this time". ;)